Peter-Pan Syndrome: 5 Signs You Are A Man-Child (& How To Grow Up)

Something strange happened the other day.

I checked my YouTube analytics to find that an old video of mine took off.

A video from 3 years ago.

Right now it’s getting 1,000 views a day which for my channel is a big deal.

And it made me wonder because of the topic.

Being a man-child. A boy stuck in a man’s body. An old infant.

I made this video a long time ago … but apparently, the struggle to fully grow up and become a man is as strong as ever.

So I thought I’d dive back into the topic once again and give you a few more signs that your inner child may be running your life.

If you want to become a man of high impact and value, awareness of your behaviour is the first step.

So here we go…

What is Peter Pan/Man-Child Syndrome

We live in the age of the absent father.

And weak, passive or absent fathers fail to properly introduce their sons to life.

Not only that … his lack of powerful presence means the mother has to take up the slack and lean on the son for her emotional needs.

This creates an overbearing mother with an unhealthily suffocating relationship with her son.

In order for a man to be a man, he must let his parents go.

But too many men are still attached to their mothers, either consciously or unconsciously.

And lacking the masculine edge that their father should have taught them, they’re left with a deep-seated fear of life.

This is what a man-child is.

A man who is afraid.

Of change. Of decisions. Of emotions. Of intimacy.

Of everything.

And he lives his life completely driven by fear.

5 Signs You Have Peter Pan Syndrome

#1 - Sexual compulsions

Many partners. Little intimacy.

Compulsive masturbation.

Constant porn use and you can’t quit.

There are many reasons for this.

But a man who’s still unconsciously attached to his mother will try and climb back inside the womb.

He can’t do this. So sex is a cheap substitute.

He puts pussy before purpose and his potential is never realised.

How to overcome this? 

Cut the chord to your mother. I wrote an article and made a video about this.

#2 - Uncommitted

You start many projects but don’t finish any of them.

You’re all talk and no action. Tons of plans. None of them realised.

And the people around you notice your lack of follow-through.

Like Peter Pan who wants to stay a golden child.

How to overcome? 

Pick one great project and stick with it.

Grow. Develop. Adapt. Overcome. Continue to completion.

Repeat.

This is the path of mastery. The path of a powerful man.

#3 - Anxiety

You have a constant hum of anxiety in the background.

Your fear of life manifests as literal anxiety in the body.

Sometimes panic. Other times nervousness.

You are in a fear state the majority of your waking life.

How to overcome?

Move towards what you fear gradually one step at a time.

Make friends with your fear.

Go deeply into the body through movement, breathwork and embodiment practice.

#4 - Avoidance of responsibility and commitment

“I want my freedom,” says the man-child

But there’s something he isn’t aware of.

The immature man can only find freedom in the absence of commitment.

The mature man finds freedom in his undying commitment to what he most values.

How to overcome?

Clarify your values, take full responsibility for your life and choose one thing to make a serious commitment to.

For example, my YouTube channel is one thing I am fully committed to.

#5 - Lying/dishonesty

You’re afraid of emotional intensity.

And because you’re still psychologically dependent on others for validation and approval, you are also afraid of rejection.

This makes you dishonest in your relationships.

You might routinely lie/distort the truth to appear greater than you are.

Or deceive people to prevent them from seeing how scared or lost you really are.

How to overcome?

Start catching yourself deceiving and start telling the truth - and facing how life arranges itself around you.

If you resonated with this, I want to be straight with you.

You can overcome this.

You can become the powerful, confident and strong man you know you can be.

Pick a direction and take action.

And if you need 1:1 support with this, please book a free call with me.

Let's get clear and get moving.

To your growth,

Oliver