Hey man
Do you ever feel like something inside of you is holding you back?
Let me get nice and vulnerable for a moment.
Recently, I got hit with a wave of procrastination.
I love my work as a coach and making videos etc — but out of nowhere I started feeling fatigued, drained and just "meh" about life.
But then I came across an inner work exercise that completely turned it around for me.
Today I want to share what that exercise is, why it’s so beneficial, and how you can start using it right away.
I'm also giving you a free template at the end you can download.
To explain, imagine your mind as a huge house party that you’ve thrown.
Each person at the party represents a different part of your mind.
We’ve got Mr. Anxious, Mr. Addict, and in my case, Mr. Meh.
There's a bunch of other characters—all invited.
For the party to go smoothly, you want everyone to get along, have enough to eat and drink, and maybe enjoy some entertainment.
But then, you come back from the bathroom and notice a strange vibe spreading through the party.
- Mr. Anxious is sitting alone in a corner, not talking to anyone.
- Mr. Addict is drinking all the booze.
- Mr Meh is miserable bringing the whole mood down.
Now, the party’s dying, and no one’s having a good time.
But here’s the thing—unlike a real party, these people are parts of your mind, so they can’t leave. And neither can you.
So, as the host, it’s up to you to go talk to these characters, figure out what’s going on, and help them get along.
Only then can the party—and your mind—become a fun place again.
How do you do that?
Well here's how most people handle it — and why it fails.
Most people try to change the party by getting aggressive with the guests at their party.
This might scare them into behaving for a moment — but this change will only be temporary, and nobody will be enjoying themselves.
We need a way to restore harmony long-term in a way that benefits everyone.
Well, that’s where this exercise comes in.
It’s called Active Imagination, and I recently discovered it in the book Inner Work by Robert Johnson.
With this technique, you use your imagination to talk with these different parts of your mind—the ones causing the disturbance at your mental party.
If this sounds impractical or a bit “woo-woo,” stay with me. I’ll walk you through it step-by-step in just a moment.
But first, let me show you how I did it.
I wasn’t expecting much when I started the exercise, but then it happened.
I imagined myself on a beautiful beach.
Then, without warning, a part of my mind appeared—a very wise woman in a Middle Eastern red robe with gold embroidery.
The image appeared clear as day. I wasn't forcing it. It was like a daydream.
I asked her for guidance, and she responded.
She told me to bring my heart along with me in everything I do.
This might not sound profound to you, but for me, it was like a revelation.
It felt almost like a psychedelic experience.
I had a huge emotional release because I understood what she meant.
“Remember the heart. Connect with the people you serve. Remember why you started.”
This technique helped me realise that Mr. Meh was taking over my inner party because I had become too goal-focused to enjoy what I was doing.
It’s like something shifted in me since then.
So that's me.
Now, let's talk about you.
How do you practice it? Is it just as simple as sitting there and imagining things?
Not quite.
In Inner Work, Johnson describes a four-step process, which I’ve tweaked a bit for clarity and simplicity:
Step One: Invitation
Sit quietly and set a focus for the session.
This could be a painful emotion or a problem you’re facing.
Focus on your breathing, then bring your attention to your imagination.
Let your mind represent the problem with an image—it almost always will.
It could be a character in a movie, a real-life person or an animal.
Allow any image to come and don’t overthink it.
Step Two: Dialogue
Take out a pen and paper or open a document on your laptop.
Begin a conversation with this part of you.
Ask questions like:
- “Why are you here?”
- “What do you have to teach me?”
- “When were you created?”
If you sit there, undistracted and open-minded, this dialogue will start revealing things.
Sometimes, even things that feel a bit spooky.
Step Three: Negotiation
If there’s an issue or painful emotion, ask this part what you can do to help.
But if it requests something unreasonable or harmful, remember—you’re the leader of your inner world.
Negotiate with it.
For example, when I asked the woman in the red dress how I could stay connected to my heart, she told me to quit coffee. I agreed to cut down instead which she was okay with.
Step Four: Integration
If you aren’t committed to taking action, this is like listening to everyone at the party, then going upstairs and shutting the door on them.
You need to listen to what a part tells you and commit to integrating it into your life.
For example, if there’s a part of you that procrastinates, maybe you negotiated to do 30 minutes of work in exchange for 15 minutes of a favourite hobby.
And if that part gives you 30 minutes of work, hold up your end of the bargain.
Otherwise, that part may not trust you next time.
I know this whole thing might feel like you're just making all of this up. I struggled with this for a bit.
But in the book, Johnson mentions that this is perfectly okay — since anything you can "make up" ends up coming from your own mind anyway.
Now I go into a session intending to make the whole thing up … and then some unexpected stuff always comes into the picture.
This will reveal the hidden parts of your psyche to you in ways that will feel genuinely creepy with their accuracy.
Now, if you're ready to dive deep into this practice immediately, I have put together a 6 part-guided active imagination series that walks you through the process.
I also created a free document you can duplicate and use.
That's it from me for today.
See you in the next one,
Stay courageous,
Oliver
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